Saturday, February 21, 2009
Help Save Red Curtain Children
0 commentsWe may have been wrong about this all along. Perhaps the GOP doesn't really want full intrusion into the Web habits of Americans for political reasons. Maybe, just maybe, it's a cry for help.
Stories of the GOP during the Bush years were rife with tales of both high and low politicians and GOP functionaries, and their predilection for underage boys and girls. And of their amazing ability for getting caught at it. Especially those souls whose GOP-awarded jobs specifically were aimed at protecting children!
Perhaps, the modern GOPer just can't bring himself to click away from his favorite kiddie porn sites. And hates himself for his addiction.
So, voila!
GOP: ISPs, Wi-Fi Must Keep Logs For Police
More wackiness from behind the Loony Red Curtain: Three GOPers from Texas, U.S. Sen. John Cornyn, Rep. Lamar Smith and Texas Attorney General Greg Abbott are desperate for help since GOPers cannot keep their hands off of their own, or their neighbor's, children.
So they want the adults in the rest of America to monitor their behavior for them, even if it means creating a police state for everybody else.
A small price to pay, mirror-looking GOPers say, if it helps keep their children safe from post-teen GOPers in good, Christian, Red Curtain towns like theirs.
These people are sick.
But, alas, free mental health services are among the first things cut in Red State budgets.
Perhaps we need to begin an Underground Railroad for Texas children to ferry them to safe havens elsewhere.
Oh. And BTW, while we're keeping America's children safe, keep the GOP's hands off of the Web. They'll just have to learn to deal with its use like everyone else. A bit of self-restraint will do them wonders.
posted by Gotham 3:23 PM
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